Martini Highs

It was Friday. At last. She was sitting in front of the TV watching rugby league … not really paying attention. It was the NRL semi finals, a pretty big thing here Down Under and Mr She was watching with great concentration. She felt she should at least pretend to be present and interested. The shorts were tight and the shoulders were wide and she could only imagine how hard and fir those chests were but it was a fleeting fancy and her mind was wandering. Mr She had been away all week and she felt she should be with him, in body at least, if not in mind, so she sat. And she watched. And every now and then she made an appropriate noise of appreciation or dismay or outright disgust at the refereeing.

Her energy was high but her self loathing was also. She’d lost a bit of weight so had spent an hour digging through her wardrobe while Mr She was out …. desperately trying to look sexy and alluring for his return … channeling her inner burlesque goddess but to no avail… she had ended up feeling like a fat hippo about to give birth to sextuplets … the mirror had been evil and cruel. She eventually gave up and that was when the espresso martinis felt like a very great idea.

However, even so, she had had a great day and was feeling positive, happy, blessed. Everything she’d touch today had just worked, jelled – she felt accomplished. It had been a long time since she had felt this good and she wondered if it was actually her achievements over the course of the day or the four espresso martinis that had been quickly consumed while cooking dinner.

So now here she was, trying to rein in her thoughts, realising that it had been some time since her last She Diaries entry and there was oh so much to tell, and yet nothing … too many thoughts in her head – she was struggling to navigate through the tumbleweeds and focus on just one thread of gold to spin.

The last month had been a whirlwind of stress, grief and anxiety. Work travel meaning getting up at stupid o’clock at a time when it was still considered cold (she was now acclimatised to think 15 degrees was positively freezing), ongoing house renovations …. puppies – so much cuteness and love – all culminating in a barrel load of emotions. Saying goodbye to her old girl Tess, her precious fur baby had been heartbreaking, and all whilst Mr She had been away. As a result her heart was still raw. Goodbye too to the puppies, gifted to new homes with wonderful new lives ahead of them, but still a wrench, a piece of her heart forever gone. And Ruby, her mini Tess, a parting gift from Tess if you will, the new member of the She family, already under her skin and firmly in her heart, cuteness overload.

Half time now and the martinis were working their magic. Nine PM Friday night … relaxed and ready to hit the sack, to sink into her pillow and let her dreams entertain her. What a rockstar!

She had the weekend ahead of her … her man was home and her heart was repairing helped in great measure by the soothing elixir of the martinis. It was Friday … Monday was an age away.